Archive for Horse Cum Drinking

You’ve Probably Had Worse in Your Mouth Part Tres: Horses

Posted in 'Round the Interwebs, Animals, Food, Horses, Pets with tags , , , , , , , , , on February 18, 2011 by jlzammit

Looks like our fine New Zealand counterparts are guzzling horse-cum and calling it a delicacy, much to the delight and pleasure of horses everywhere.

Fuck Yes!

Granted, we do eat a lot of products from animals from breast milk to bug poop, but do we really need to have horse semen on the market?

Really?

I can see where they’re coming from, just as we link a wolf to powers of fierce male virility and mysterious loners, we can link horses to… well… male virility and power and whatnot.

Maybe it’s to do with how we still, to this day, refer to anything in terms of horsepower, or that cowboys and horses go hand in hand, cos let’s face it, there is nothing more manly and badass than a cowboy right?

Right?

Or maybe it’s just the size of their wang).

Yup, think it's the wang

 

So it’s probably not that far a stretch to market it to people on the size of that beast alone, just look at that artistic rendition, it could crush walnuts and would easily feed a family of five.

(On a side note, it was extremely hard to find of pic of a stand alone horse wang not being blown by a young Brazillian. So either they’re perverted as fuck down there, or have been onto this horse-cum-as-nectar-of-the-gods for years!)

Personally, I love the research the team behind this have come up with,

“You often hear from a female perspective that semen has an awful alkaline taste,”

Now… given the nature of the article, does he mean human semen or horse-semen? Does he have a team of Brazilians all lined up, nodding profusely that they’d enjoy guzzling down horse cock more if it tasted less alkaline and more like cherry, liquorice or banoffee pie (the fuck is that?).

Banoffee?

This guys marketing strategy is also pretty sound,

“….there’s a lot of nutters over here game for anything you know.”

Insult your potential client base! Why? Because fuck them, those horse-cum drinking thunder cunts, they don’t deserve my respect. That’s why.

But kudos to this guy bringing a fine Brazilian hobby to our neighbours across the sea and in the same process making us more culturally aware.

Well done guy.

Now that I come to think of it… I don’t think I’ve had worse in my mouth…

- J.L.

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